Good day, dear blog readers. Today I want to tell you where to start self-development for girls and why it is important to start doing this as quickly as possible.
The first stages on the path of a girl’s self-development
For girls, self-realization can lie in many aspects at once, including work, study, family, appearance and many other facets. Moreover, some of them will actually contribute to development, and, accordingly, to a good internal sense of self. The other part will be imposed by social stereotypes and will only lead to a breakdown.
Self-improvement is a long process that has no end point. Rather it's certain style life, attitude, philosophy and interest in the world around us. But this does not mean that it happens independently and unsystematically. On the contrary, it requires clear goal setting, a plan and an understanding of the direction of movement in order to adjust actions.
Target
In the process of defining a goal, it is necessary to correctly calculate your own strengths and interests. Otherwise, you may find yourself jumping on to many offers without following through on anything.
On initial stage goals should be:
- real;
- short-term;
- motivating.
The reality of goals is understood as correlating them with one’s capabilities. If you set yourself the task of running 5 kilometers tomorrow, and before that for several years you even drove a car to the neighboring store, then best case scenario you will fail the goal, in the worst case you will be taken away by an ambulance.
Short-term achievement is necessary to maintain motivation for further achievements. In the first days of the “new life”, old promises fulfilled, cleaning done, a new manicure, a chapter read will give you inspiration, but the duration of getting the desired position or graduating from university can be depressing due to the daily lack of visible results.
But you can cheat and not give up on global dreams, you just need to break them down into smaller component tasks. You can start your weight loss program by purchasing a gym membership. Develop your creativity by signing up for several master classes that will help you decide on a direction.
It is important to check each goal for truth, whether it is really yours - this is what the motivation point implies. If a woman needs to learn new language, then this will most likely be done for the sake of new travels or to better understand your foreign lover; the desire may also be associated with promotion on the career ladder.
But if such undertakings occur because one of the relatives demands something similar or parents in childhood expected success in precisely this area, then there will be no sense. Remember how easy it was for you to do the most difficult and crazy things when you were in love, and how everything fell out of your hands if you had to do something against your will. The feeling of being slightly in love is the main accompanying factor in rapid and high-quality changes.
You will find methods for setting goals.
Areas of self-improvement or what to choose
A harmonious personality develops safely in several directions at once, maintaining all important life spheres. But being at the beginning of the journey, you should carry out a kind of diagnostics of the initial data in order to understand what you will have to work on first.
Good guides for identifying weak areas are:
- own feeling of dissatisfaction;
- dissatisfaction of people whose opinions play an important role (problems are often visible only from the outside);
- present desires and dreams.
To make it easier to navigate, psychologists have classified the main areas of life:
- health;
- spiritual (emotional) sphere;
- material security;
- family;
- friendly relations;
- creation;
- Professional Development.
For the most part, each person has a deficiency in the development of several areas at once, which indirectly affects the condition of others. It is from places that are in short supply that you should begin your self-development, and best assistant For this purpose, there may be an area that is best developed.
For example, if you are completely unsuccessful at work, but everything is fine in your relationships with friends, then you can turn to them for help in finding a job. If you are a creative but lonely person, then organizing your own exhibition can not only expand your circle of acquaintances, but also lead to changes in your family status.
Planning your development
In relation to the goals set, it is necessary to build a clear plan for further actions, which will allow you to see the big picture, notice the speed of progress, and also not deviate from what was planned. Naturally, each such plan will be unique, but there are also common points.
Step-by-step instructions for self-development:
- Select several goals of different sizes. Let some points be completed in 1 day, others require several months or 1 year to implement.
- For each goal, create milestones indicating progress towards achievement (purchase of subscriptions, fixed indicators, quantitative achievements, etc.).
- The stages need to be arranged on a time scale - what needs to be completed in a month, in a week, tomorrow, tonight. Completion times and related metrics must be specified. “Jogging today” and “running a 10 km distance today at 6.00” are completely different points. The more specific you are in your planning, the better.
- Take action immediately after defining a plan. Don't leave it until tomorrow or Monday, much less until next month. Do at least something small today, immediately after drawing up a plan (well, at least Google the necessary information on your chosen goals).
The most important thing is don’t lose positive attitude, even if it didn’t work out right away. Record attempts, adjust the load, since the first failures are most often associated with the inadequacy of the requirements. Remember that any mistake is already experience.
What helps you not to give up halfway?
Step-by-step instructions only set the direction. Initial confidence quickly disappears as life changes and tension arises. Self-development is always a way out of a comfortable state of suspended animation, where nothing happens, but where you really want to return. In order not to regret the efforts spent and not to start from the beginning many times, it is worth providing yourself with additional support in advance.
The reaction of the social environment is important to every girl. Therefore, it would be great to inform all your loved ones about the decision taken change in better side. Notify family about disposal bad habits, then they will do everything to minimize provoking factors and will encourage you in moments when you want to break down.
You can look for like-minded people among your friends, especially when it comes to acquiring new knowledge and skills. It's much more fun to take a class together or sweat on the treadmill. In addition, it may turn out that it was the absence of a partner that stopped your friends from their own development.
By the way, don’t forget to tell your enemies about your plans - this is an excellent negative motivation. Knowing that these are the people who are waiting for your failure, constantly asking sarcastic questions about changes, you can not only successfully achieve your goal, but also surpass the planned results.
Make new acquaintances in areas where you want to develop. If you are going to improve your relationship, subscribe to a psychologist’s blog or page, communicate, ask questions. If you are thinking about expanding your geography, meet flight attendants, tour organizers and travelers. This way you will get a lot useful information, which is not available on the Internet.
Personal communication with a person who has already achieved something in the area you need allows you to learn faster and better, avoiding many mistakes when drawing up an independent route.
Inspirational Literature
Books on self-development are very different: from direct instructions on what to do and in what order, with a description of what your happiness lies in, to methods for spiritually searching for your own path.
- Professional development is presented in the books of Stephen Covey "7 Habits of Highly Effective People", Seth Godin "Pit".
- Spiritual and personal growth discussed in the work of Robin Sharma "The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari" and Paulo Coelho "Alchemist".
- Sphere love relationship includes "How to make anyone fall in love with you" Leila Laudensa, "You don't know anything about men" Steve Harvey "The School of Geisha in Ten Simple Lessons" Eliza Tanaka, and "5 love languages" G. Chapman.
This is just a small list of literature related to the most common topics of self-development. Start there if you haven't read any of it yet. Many other related books can be found.
Also, be sure to check it out these are the free courses, especially for women. There you will find exactly what suits you.
Conclusion
Whatever path you choose, try to make it individual and bring happiness. Joy is an indicator of the right direction of development. And don't forget to share own ideas and successes with loved ones, help others develop. If you know someone who needs some kind of push, share a link to my article and offer to start moving towards change together.
See you again and good luck on your path of achievement!
The material was prepared by Yulia Gintsevich.
The need for spiritual and physical development no doubt. Their parents are concerned about raising young children. An older person builds himself as a person. But how to organize this process correctly, where to start self-development?
About self-improvement
What advice can you give to someone who has decided to improve themselves? First, you need to figure out what exactly he is going to improve, what the meaning of the concept of “self-development” is for him. Modern tendencies This term often means the opportunity to become successful. Not smart, not kind, not talented, but simply someone who has achieved some success. But is this the goal we really need to strive for?
Let's think for a moment: geniuses and simply successful people of yesteryear did not read self-development books! But this did not stop them from achieving remarkable results. Moreover, it is difficult to imagine psychological training that could make an artist talented, or a self-development brochure that allowed a scientist to make a brilliant discovery. Without a doubt, each of the realized individuals worked a lot on themselves, but it is unlikely that these were methods similar to those that are recommended today.
About the goals of self-development
An artist who paints his canvases, a writer, a sculptor - before they even start work, they already imagine the desired result. And the scientist, approaching his discovery, sees his cherished goal: new device, the proven theorem. Anyone thinking about how to start self-development must also imagine what results he wants to achieve. Without realizing this, it is stupid to begin the process of your own restructuring.
There is no need to remind once again about the need for physical improvement: the phrase “In healthy body healthy mind" speaks about this quite specifically. As for other types of improvement, 30-40 years ago the ideas on this matter were different. To the question of what to do for self-development, answers would be given that are fundamentally different from modern ones. However, a person working on himself would then also be sent to literature - to the works of the classics.
Jack London. "Martin Eden"
Unlike modern psychologists, representing detailed algorithms of where to start self-development, classic literature does not give specific advice. She simply invites a person to think, to understand his own soul. And also try to answer the main question about why he is on this earth, what is the meaning of the life given to him.
Jack London's novel Martin Eden can easily be called a self-development textbook. A young boy, a sailor, having fallen in love with a girl from another circle, begins to work hard on himself, learn and improve in order to be worthy of his beloved. And this brings generous results: the former sailor becomes a famous writer, a rich man. But the once-desired success does not give Eden satisfaction, and even passionate feelings leave him. Our hero understands that the beautiful image of his beloved that he drew was just a beautiful dream, and the real girl is limited and selfish.
And what is the result? After all this grandiose work on himself, Eden is left with only bitter disappointment and a persistent reluctance to live. The author is certainly proud of his hero and his desire for excellence. But the novel also speaks about the incorrect placement of life priorities, and about the tragic attempts of a person to comprehend life and himself in it.
About books
There are many works in the world that help people understand the essence of the universe. But, perhaps, the best books on self-development are the immortal works of Leo Tolstoy. These are the deepest reflections on morality and faith, on feelings and duty, on heroism, compassion and love. Tolstoy's descriptions and his conclusions are akin to reasoning the best psychologists guiding their clients through life.
But what does self-improvement have to do with it? There is a wonderful and very correct phrase “The soul must work!” The works of Tolstoy and other classics, passed through the mind and soul, are the best answer to the question of what to do for self-development. In the process of reading, the soul becomes purer, the mind becomes brighter, and the person becomes better.
About life approaches
Why does a person live? The following phrase was once popular: “Man is born for happiness, like a bird is born for flight.” But now these words are hardly remembered; they do not fit well into the current coordinate system. Happiness is a fragile concept and difficult to teach. It's a matter of success! Successful people in full view of everyone, they are worshiped, envied, and tried to imitate. Fashion trend began to teach to be successful: the goal of all trainings and seminars on personal development is precisely this attitude. But how correct is this?
The richest man of our time, Bill Gates, wrote a will according to which his children receive practically nothing. What is this - a whim, tyranny? Or, on the contrary, fatherly wisdom, the desire for happiness for one’s own children? It seems to be the latter.
Money by itself has never made anyone happy. It is unlikely that Gates, on the approaches to the heights, racked his brains over where to start self-development and how to achieve success with its help. His life was simply interesting and fulfilling, consisting of favorite things and the discoveries and disappointments that accompany any work, achievements and failures. In this life there was a thirst for victory and excitement, probably happiness. Leaving your children only money, depriving them of the need to move forward and truly live, means making them deeply unhappy. Gates realized this in time.
And again about happiness
For many, there is a clear substitution of concepts, and success becomes an end in itself. In fact, the psychology of a person’s self-development should be based on his desire for happiness. Success can only be a partial, accompanying result. Example: a girl wants to get married, she is only interested in “princes” (by the way, a considerable part of psychological literature is devoted to this very thing - to teach young people to always achieve their goals). And, let’s even say, for our heroine, armed with the advice of professionals, everything works out - the “prince” is with her. But will this bring them both happiness? Will their home become warm, will love and joy settle in it?
But in real fairy tales everything is different. Folklore characters dream exclusively of love and strive for it, sweeping away any obstacles. Is this why the endings of fairy tales are much better than those that await us in real life?
What should I do?
If you don’t set your specific goal to achieve success, then what should you do? Sit down, like the legendary Emelya, on the stove and wait for happiness to come? In no case! It is unlikely to visit lazy people with empty souls. The path to happiness is hard work, it is an attempt to understand and change yourself in order to become better. Where to start self-development? From books and music, the perception of beauty (it’s not for nothing that it is said that beauty will save the world!). Also from trying to understand the people nearby, from the desire to improve life around (difficult in an inharmonious world!).
Self-improvement involves serious work on yourself, and in this matter, the recommendations of specialists will be more than appropriate. Of course, not all. Instructions to achieve success at any cost and to walk towards your goal almost over corpses will never make a person happy. Only those tips that contribute to real improvement of human qualities will be useful.
It's no secret that people are born different. Absolutely everyone needs wise teachers, even the strongest and most talented. But in one case, the role of adviser will take on good book, and in another, a person needs serious outside help.
What do psychologists tell you? How to start self-development correctly? Although the methods of specialists sometimes differ significantly and are far from indisputable, a number of recommendations are still worth taking note. For example, to get to know yourself, try to understand your goals and desires, soberly assess your strengths and weaknesses, so that you can then work on both, improving as a person. Any person has a limit to his capabilities, but self-development allows you to push boundaries and accomplish what seemed impossible just yesterday.
Psychologists have a lot in stock practical advice. For example, discover something new every day - the process of self-development is endless. And also break a big goal into stages so that the process of achieving it does not seem so difficult. Recommendations on how to overcome the inherent laziness of many, how not to give in to difficulties, how to do what you love, and not what you have to do, will also be useful.
Extremely important advice psychologists will be available for people burdened with complexes. Very often, a person’s self-development and achievement of a set goal are hindered by the inability to communicate and imposing one’s will on others is not good - everyone knows this. But there is nothing better than always giving in, not being able to insist on your own, constantly extinguishing your impulses, needs, desires.
Organizational advice will also be valuable for personal self-development. overcome obstacles and achieve success? How to spend less time on work, but at the same time get more done, how not to be afraid of failures and learn from your mistakes? You can even teach a person to read books in a new way, while getting maximum benefit. After all, without the ability to perceive information, there is no self-development!
Live in joy
So what is human self-development? This is the path to harmony, to life satisfaction, to happiness. Therefore, the most important and truly invaluable are those tips that encourage a person to be happy. How to live your life fruitfully and healthy? How to get rid of anger and envy, learn to believe in yourself, develop positive attitude to yourself and people? The result of self-development should be the ability to love and make friends, the ability to appreciate human warmth and admire beauty. The desire for harmony and perfection is in a person’s blood; you just need to direct these impulses in the necessary direction.
Instructions
Learn to plan your day the night before. It is not necessary to describe the coming day down to the minute. Just make a list of important things and necessary actions. Prepare clothes and other things you might need in the morning in the evening. This way you will be more focused and can achieve more.
To constantly engage in self-development, write down worthwhile ideas. This way you won't miss any important ideas. Record all the ideas that come to your mind or are heard. Carry a notepad with valuable information with myself. Keeping a diary is useful for self-development. Write down all your victories and achievements in it. This way you will monitor your own development.
Develop positive personal qualities. For example, train yourself to be punctual. Do everything on time, become more organized. Punctuality is the key to success in business and in relationships with others. Watch your speech, try to express yourself correctly and accurately. Avoid swear words.
Appreciate own time. If you decide to engage in self-development, set a time limit for surfing the Internet. Try to learn something new every day. Learn several foreign words daily. All these simple steps If performed regularly, they will become an excellent basis for your development.
You will receive an answer to your question where to start self-development after reading this article. Here I will share with you a technique that will keep you busy just 40 minutes a day. These classes will be your answer to the question of how to start self-development right now! No lifestyle changes are required from you at the moment, just 40 minutes of practice daily! Almost immediately you will feel relaxation, improved well-being, and it will not require lengthy preparation from you. But more on that later, first let me start with a preface.
By typing this article, I feel a huge responsibility. Because I am well aware of what a delicate, careful attitude a person requires towards himself at the moment of searching for the starting point from which self-development begins.
How and when to start self-development? How it should NOT be started.
That is why I will try to give the most clear and most appropriate answer to the main question of this article. But not every answer can be successful, no matter how accurately it reflects the main stages of self-development, there is always a danger that this answer can scare you away, make you give up precisely at the moment that may turn out to be the most crucial, important point in your life, when it is determined whether you will follow the path of self-improvement or continue to live old life. I'll explain this a little below.
Many information sources trying to answer the question " how to start self-development?“, dump a bunch of advice on the reader. These tips cannot be called harmful or incorrect. They are simply untimely. Since they propose to begin making fundamental changes in lifestyle, habits, daily routine, social relationships, etc., in general, radically revise the existing, familiar state of affairs.
Such advice, calling for drastic, rapid changes, requires colossal willpower and energy in the person to whom they are addressed. After all, not everyone is able to immediately part with their favorite habits and begin to organize free and work time, stop aimless, unproductive wandering on the Internet and take up reading books or other sources that promote personal self-development along with general erudition.
People get used to their way of life, for this reason they are not able to magic wand, rebuild it and start changing for the better. Moreover, such a radical transition to new habits, as well as routines, requires such things as willpower, character, determination, focus on the goal, the ability to make decisions, and bear responsibility for them. But these things are components of personality development, they develop as you go through the stages of self-development.
And if someone asks " where to start self-development”, then the conclusion is drawn that this “someone” is still only at the origins of this path and, therefore, may not possess some of the above-mentioned qualities.
It turns out that in the service of a good goal there was a wrong approach. My task is harmonious self-improvement, which I understand as the balanced development of intellectual, physical, aesthetic, social and spiritual qualities. We are not going to rush anywhere just yet. After all, I do not offer any quick solutions, but am aimed at the progressive gradual formation of you as an individual.
How to start self-development today
Therefore, I am not going to expect any rapid changes from you, but I will suggest starting small. From such a “small” thing, which will not be a challenge to your usual way of life, will not take up a lot of your time and effort (you will only need 40 minutes of time a day). But later, with regular practice, it will bring a lot of life benefits. And only then, gradually, when the time comes, you will begin to make changes in your life, in your character, in your environment.
You will have time to decide what you really want, what qualities to develop, what to focus on and where to move, but this still requires some help, a springboard. You can start by forming this “springboard” right today, without postponing it for the future, because it does not require special training or special skills.
I would like to emphasize once again that the use of this Eastern practice has been successfully reflected in Western culture, proving its effectiveness within the framework of exercises on relaxation, control of consciousness and neutralization of states of mental discomfort, maintaining discipline, moving from the field of esoteric knowledge to the field of scientific knowledge. Meditation - effective tool in the service of self-development!
But there must be a clear understanding that this practice is not an end in itself, just as for a runner it is not ultimate goal development of leg muscles is simply a tool for achieving the desired result: for a runner it is victory in running competitions, and for you it is harmonious and balanced self-development. You meditate not in order to ideally master the technique of meditation (although mastering it would be quite good, even necessary), but in order to make it easier to grow and develop as a person.
Personal growth is probably possible without meditation, but since I rely on own experience, I'm talking about what helped me. I don't know any other ways. For me, meditation served as an impetus for moving forward and the beginning of self-development. Finally, after a long prelude, there was a specific and clear answer to the question of how to start self-development: “start meditating!”
Firstly, as I already wrote, this will not take more than 40 minutes a day, it does not require any special conditions (you don’t have to give up everything to collect your belongings and leave for Tibet :-)). You can even do it on public transport on the way to work/school. Although it is advisable to still do this in calm atmosphere. But if this is not possible, then even the metro will do).
Is meditation difficult?
You don't need to have a lot of training to start meditating! You will master the technique with practice, it will come with time. Also, you don't have to change your habits right away, just add meditation in the morning and evening to your daily routine. The main condition is to do this regularly, don't forget and don't forget, only then will you feel the beneficial effect.
The effect manifests itself differently for everyone. I have it in six months. Don't let this deadline scare you: There will be no immediate results!. You must firmly understand this and come to terms with this thought. In my opinion, instant results are a myth, a phantom. All important, fundamental changes in personality are long and gradual character) So where to start?
Meditation is your practice, which will provide you with the necessary skills for self-development; it is a kind of fundamental exercise that you need to start doing first of all. This is also necessary, just as a beginning gymnast should start by stretching before moving on to everything else.
First, familiarize yourself with the theory in, and then you can begin the practice itself. Remember, no one is rushing you, you don’t need to have time to read it all in the shortest possible time. If you are too lazy to study all these theoretical materials, then start practicing right away, but at least read the conclusions outlined in the first step.
In conclusion, I would like to note that although the main long-term effect of meditation does not appear immediately, you will feel some positive changes almost immediately after starting practice. This is because you will simply be regularly relax and put your thoughts in order(this refers to instant effects), which is already good. In addition, you introduce a mandatory exercise into your routine, which you will do every day, strictly twice a day for 20 minutes per session, this will already introduce some minimal additional order into your life (whatever you do every day, it doesn’t matter meditation this is exercise or daily jogging). This teaches you to keep your promises to yourself, to maintain discipline, which is perhaps one of the most significant stages of self-development.
I hope you are ready to get started. Wish you luck!
Every day our world moves forward and develops at the speed of the wind. Many people strive to keep up with it and keep up with the times in order to live happily and comfortably. If a person does not strive to develop, he begins to degrade, which leads to unsatisfactory life and the habit of blaming everyone for his unhappy fate. To prevent this from happening, you should not stop there, but move forward and not forget your beginning.
What to do first?
Often people themselves understand that it is necessary to change in life and first of all start with self-development. They are being pushed to do this various reasons, falling in love, life problems, environment and dull, from which you want to get out quickly. Your desire to change everything must be sincere and enormous, this is the only way you will succeed. If today you want it, but tomorrow you don’t, then the result will be zero, and you will remain at the same level you were at.
Many people live completely aimlessly in our world, and therefore they do not have any bright moments in their lives. For such individuals, all days are similar to each other. A person wakes up, goes to work, comes home, goes to bed, and in the morning everything starts all over again. And in old age he begins to realize that he wasted his time. Successful and rich people always achieve what they want through hard work.
Therefore, first of all, it is important to know what you want and learn to set goals correctly. When a person has his own goal, not imposed by anyone, then he will do everything to achieve the final result. He is inspired by a dream, so he will stop at nothing, naturally within reasonable limits.
A big mistake many people make is. They know what they want, but they don’t take any action; they put everything off until later until better times. This is absolutely impossible to do, because life does not stand still. You should hurry up and start turning your goals into reality.
One of the rules of developing people is. They try to write down everything that happens to them during the day. Many people think that only little girls and young ladies do this, but this is simply a misconception. With a diary, you will be able to understand and analyze not only your actions, but also your character traits. This way you will realize which area you need to pay more attention and self-development to.
Where to start with your changes and development?
After numerous conversations with people who managed to change their lives, psychologists have identified several important recommendations, which will be very useful in the development of other people.
One of the main tips for starting self-development is a daily routine. It is very important to learn to stick to it every day. Make a plan for the whole day, starting with getting up and ending with going to bed. Start with the smallest things. , around 6 o'clock in the morning, and go to bed no later than eleven in the evening. Once you achieve this, you can safely add new items. A person must find his biorhythms, because this is how he loses vigor, strength and energy.
Hobby. People who have favorite hobby, develop gradually and evenly. The main thing is to choose exactly what you like most, what brings you pleasure, freedom and great mood. It could be anything, from playing chess to surfing.
Reading books and articles. We now take most of the information from the Internet, but we should not forget about literature. Try to read every day not only interesting books in your favorite genre, but also switch to other topics. When you immerse yourself in reading, you get rid of negative thoughts and clear your mind of unnecessary worries, and when books are also motivating, it will help you and your strength.
